Be Aware of These Friendship Problems
By Harleena Singh from Aha Now
So many Friendships break up needlessly these days. With so much Stress around us, is it any wonder that Friends go their separate ways when something questionable or stressful comes up in their relations? Momentarily speaking, it’s just more stress than enough, we are handling aye? But if you’re interested, there are Solutions other than giving up on a Friendship that so many of us don’t realize that could save a Good Friendship or maybe even change an Average Friendship into a Good Friendship. So in the interest of such, shall we go? (Janet)
Like all relationships, friendships too have problems. But most problems in friendship have a solution. Here are the top friendship problems with solutions.
Friendship Problems You Might Face and Their Solutions
Differences
Mistrust
Conflicts
Inconsistency
Non-Commitment
Betrayal
Treasure Your Friendship
Interpersonal relationships at times get sour due to misunderstandings or other reasons. It happens in friendships too. There are various kinds of problems you may face but the good thing is that every problem has a solution. Friends can get over their friendship problems through proper communication. Here are some of the common friendship problems and how you can work to resolve them. ~ Ed.
Let’s face it, who doesn’t have friendship problems? For that matter, every interpersonal relationship does come up with problems at some time or the other.
However, every problem has a solution. Mostly the solution is inherent in the problem.
All you need to do is understand the problem in detail, introspect, change perspectives, use some borrowed wisdom, and a lot of common sense.
But this doesn’t mean that you don’t try to avoid these friendship problems. Of course, you’ve to be aware and beware of them!
So, here we’re talking about friendships – one of the most beautiful human relationships.
And also about the petty issues that can ruin such relationships. But you don’t have to worry as I’ve got some solutions too, that can help you avoid the friendship problems.
Remember: it’s easy to make friends, but when it comes to solving friendship problems, the task could be seemingly daunting and difficult, but not so if you continue to read further.
Friendship Problems You Might Face and Their Solutions
Problems in friendship can have any face, and can be of any type or nature. Sometimes they’re real or imaginary, while at other times they results due to misunderstanding and confusion.
There are friendships issues that occur at all ages, whether among children, teenagers, and adults.
Here are some common problems in friendship that teenagers and adults face, some of which even lead to breakups.
Although I’m no expert, yet I’ve tried to provide solutions or suggestions based on my own friendship and life experiences in an attempt to solve these friendship problems.
However, I’d also like you to give your own views and suggestions as you read the problems in this post – in the comments at the bottom of the post.
Differences
It could be that you and your friend have dissimilar interests and hobbies. In such a case you might find yourselves incompatible because you think your differences make you different.
You might undergo reorientation and have a change of interests and ideology, therefore you or your friends find it difficult to remain friends.
On this basis, you exclude your friend, or dump him or her. Or it could be that your friend ignores and rejects you.
Solution:
Though people with similar interests get along well in a friendship, but it is not always possible to have friends whose interests match yours completely.
You should adopt the principle of “unity in diversity” and develop tolerance to account for differences in your friendships.
In fact, some differences make the friendships more interesting and you get to learn more from each other.
If you both really feel that you’ve to go in different directions and it’ll really be difficult to maintain the active friendship; talk about it and happily part ways, keeping the hopes to be friends again.
However, if you’re the one who’s excluded, then talk to your friend and convey how you’re worth and can be an asset to him or her, and how you feel about the friendship.
It’s possible that your friend really likes your thoughts and you’re back to being friends again.
Mistrust
Friendship problems arise when you start doubting your friend’s honesty, integrity, and sincerity – the suspicions create a general feeling of mistrust.
You might mistrust your friend based on his or her actions or words, which you think are not in your best interests.
In such cases, based on your assumptions, you try to avoid your friend and not trust him or her with anything.
Solution:
Talk and convey your thoughts and fears. Ask your friend the reason for the mistrust, or tell the reason in a candid manner, if you’re the one who mistrusts.
Your friend might come up with an explanation that you’ll have to evaluate using your personal judgment based on the relation and experience with the person.
Trust and faith are two important holding pillars of friendship; if broken, friendship falls. Reengage in activities that help in regaining the trust in your relationship.
If your fears are proven true and you don’t feel like you can trust the person again, then it’s time to move out, or let the friendship wean off slowly.
Conflicts
Conflicts and fights are one of the major causes of creating rifts and distances between friends.
Arguments and heated discussions often create issues in friendship that are harbored for a long time – sometimes not only for many years but even carried forward to the next generation.
Solution:
Arguments and disagreements are normal in any kind of relationship, and having them does not imply the end of the relationship.
Be the first to initiate restoration of the earlier status of friendship even if it requires you to forgive or be forgiven. We all make mistakes and sometimes lose our cool and temper.
Your ego is the factor that stops you from reaching out to your friend to reconnect. If you drop your ego, chances are that your friend will understand your gesture and reciprocate in the same manner.
However, if things get out of hand and even after trying to resolve the conflict – nothing works, you could seek help, or then let go of such a friendship.
Inconsistency
Sometimes, you and your friend might not be able meet or talk on a consistent basis. Your friend might be regular for some period and then disappears for a long time period.
In such a case you feel disconnected and distanced from your friend and feel you’re having friendship problems. Does such a thing happen with you too?
Solution:
Time and distance don’t affect good friendships. But yes, there’s a difference in the level of interaction and intimacy of friends who meet regularly and occasionally.
You should try to be in touch with your friend frequently using any medium like phone calls, emails, chats, through social networking sites, or best in person.
Same is the case with online friends; you feel more connected to the ones who’re in regular touch with you. And, you can cure the friendship problems by raising the level and frequency of interaction.
If any of your friends is not able to maintain regularity, just enjoy his or her company whenever you are together.
Remember, there might be a reason why they can’t meet you often, or they could be undergoing some other personal problems also. To really know the reason, simply ask – don’t just assume; assumptions may lead to misunderstandings.
However, if you feel that your friend does not value your friendship, then you may demote him or her from your list of friends.
Non-Commitment
Sometimes, a friend of yours might not be able to help you when you require his or help the most. You develop a grudge against your friend and stop talking or interacting with him or her.
What do you do then?
You assume that your friend is not committed to the friendship and doesn’t support you. You consider this as a major friendship problem and decide to end it.
Solution:
There’s no doubt that a friend in need is a friend indeed. A friend who comes to help when needed most is better than a friend who is with you all the time but disappears when you need him or her.
However, before running to any conclusion you need to give your friend a fair hearing. Did your friend purposely stay away from you or was there any other reason for him or her to keep away from you?
If you’ve substantial proof that your friend isn’t the kind to help and support, you may keep him or her out of your inner circle of friends.
Betrayal
Did you or your friend break the promise and talk behind each other’s back about things that were supposed to be confidential?
Well, breaking promises is quite like betrayal. Even cheating or flirting with each other’s boyfriend or girlfriend is called betraying each other – isn’t it?
Betrayal is breaking the trust; an act of treachery and sign of disloyalty. Obviously, such acts would create friendship problems, or any relationship problems for that matter.
Solution:
Always keep your promises, unless you’ve strong reasons to believe that divulging the information might be more helpful. Don’t talk or do anything that you wouldn’t want your friend to do.
Convey to your friend about how you felt on being betrayed. Be clear that betrayals can break the friendship – and really do that if you feel the person is not regretful or has gone beyond the limits.
Some people flirt with their friend’s boyfriend or girlfriend to show they’re better, and to feel superior. Such people cannot be good friends and you should avoid them.
There are 4 other problems Aha Now covers in their article, I chose not to include here.
It will also benefit many of you to read my article
Ruminating Can Trip You Up – Not Good For Friendships
Because most of us Ruminate sometimes, and this can be destructive to Marriages and Friendships.